"good-bye room, thanks for raising me"

That's what Adam said... just before we left the only home he's known for the last 15 years and 349 days. I mean, its still his home, but he isn't going to be seeing it, nearly as much for hopefully, the next 2.5 years.

All four of us went up which was so lovely that we could do that, because Christian is still on break from partycollege. :( He and Adam are exceedingly close, despite Adam's disability. (I have never taken that one for granted!) We didn't have to arrive until 1:30, so we left about 90 minutes before then, because Christian's armfart (his instrument that he's majoring in, in partycollege) needed repairing (which it does at least once a year) and the repair place that we use was right on the way.

We actually got to the ourlasthopeinhell school about 20 minutes early and since there was still plenty of snow around, the entire grounds looked even more enchanting than they did 6 weeks ago, when we first visited the school. Christian was flabbergasted that Adam was going to be living in such a beautiful spot, high on a hill with a gorgeous views of trees, rolling hills and paddocks.

We forgot which building the office was in, so asked a student who happened to be coming out of another building which way it was. The teenager, smiled warmly and said "It's right across the way", pointing to the building. We went inside (they had a nice Christmas tree which made me happy) :) and everything was orchestrated to perfection. A social worker came and whisked Adam away along with all of his stuff to get him settled into his new room and then, Sam and I left Christian to read in the waiting area and we were ushered into a comfortable large conference room for our orientation by the admissions director. We were then introduced to Adam's assigned social worker, and I breathed a tremendous sigh of relief when we were greeted by a nice, clean cut youngish MAN. perfect. Adam has historically had much more success with males than most females and this person is going to be the "go to" person for Adam, so right off the bat, this was as good as it could be. We met lots of other people too-- and did a bit of paper work, etc. and then another social worker showed up and took us to see Adam's cottage--- his new home.

On the way, we came across Adam, himself, being transported in the electric cart used to carry his luggage. He had changed his clothes, already into the uniform (which they only wear on Mondays and special occasions), consisting of a blazer, khaki pants, pale oxford cloth button-down shirt and a tie. He looked fantastic, albeit a tad shell-shocked and later I told him, the line he's quoted from "Titanic" a zillion times and every time, he says it, he laughs his head off. (its one of the few ways we can actually "share", but 99% of the time, its ONLY on his terms. That's high functioning autism)

Here's the line:

"Remarkable... You could almost pass for a gentleman." (in a snobby English accent)

poor guy... I might as well've said...

non habla Espangnol... bamanos chicos est tarde con leche. LOL 

No "shut the fuck up". no word. nothing but a total deer in the headlights. shame.

Now this was not the same cottage we saw when we went to go see the school last November. The other one was very nice, but this one was really, REALLY nice!!! It is a charming two story home. Think quaint not large, but not small, slightly rambling farm house, of late 19th century vintage.  We came right into the kitchen area which was much more updated and larger and just a more interesting lay out and nicer warm colors. Then there was a smaller area with a piano and a comfortable bright sunny living room with comfortable sofas and a non-working but cool manteled fire place and LARGE flat screen TV. Cozy and lovely. Adam's room was upstairs and we went in to see it. It had bunk beds and Adam had the top bunk with a charming red, white and blue quilt, and there was a bulletin board with an attractive hand-made sign and this is what it said.

"Welcome Adam Lewis to Lexie-wood!!!"

WTF???  The name of Adam's cottage is my first name???

And then... below that were some pics of his new roommate AND, get this... it was the same boy who we had run into, when we arrived, not knowing where to go!!!!!!!

wtf!

All of this just felt soooooooo good, sooooooo right, that I could hardly contain my joy! It is so weird. The moment I laid eyes on this place, even before knowing anything about it, it just felt like home. cool.

Then..... his roommate is a LOVER of music... and had a TON of CDs... how cool! As I passed another room, I spied a guitar and saw another one that had just arrived from a kid just returning from the holiday break.

There was going to be music everywhere!

What a dream come true!

I had to use the bathroom and folks, it was recently redone and nicer than our bathrooms here-- almost spa-like! (even though I'm a designer, and our bathrooms aren't hideous, but need some work which we can't afford).

We came downstairs... and quickly said our good-byes (knowing from experience that short good-byes are best and besides Adam needed to get to his class!) and Adam spontaneously did something that he's only done once before.

He opened up his arms spontaneously and gave me a firm, sensitive, genuinely loving hug.

It is so difficult to explain.

It caught me completely off-guard and felt so completely foreign and yet so good, all at the same time, and then he turned and was out the door, towards the school building and the tears that I thought I had managed to avert, appeared, but no gushers, this time. Thank God!!! The tears were not because I was saying good-bye. Let's just get this one thing straight, okay? I am EXCRUCIATINGLY HAPPY TO BE SAYING GOOD BYE TO HIM, because he is impossible to live with and he can't keep going on like he has.

The tears were for the hug. the mundane becomes the extraordinary. its big, and brings to the surface all of the pain that has lived deeply inside me ever since I got the news when he was four:

"Adam is autistic."

And then, just like a scene out of the Truman Show, the director of Admissions showed up outside, as we were walking out of the cottage and said her good-byes reminding us that Adam was going to email us begging us to get him the hell out of there and to tell us what a fucking bitch she is.

Alright, she didn't say "fucking bitch". But, that's what she meant. :)

We chuckled in a knowing way. They've got their work cut out for them with our little headstrong psychotic boy.  Godspeed!

And then, the three of us got into the little silver Audi, and drove back to Whinyentitledton-- (stopping, on the way to have a bite to eat at a quaint coffee house in a charming classic New England town, close-by and to pick up Christian's now repaired armfart).  ;)

It just doesn't get any better than this.